3 Polyamory Tips (that I'm also still working on)
Progress is not a straight line nor does it have an end. Here are a few polyamory tips I've been reflecting on recently.
Better to over-communicate than under-communicate
While providing too many details can accidentally result in hurt feelings, it can be better than dealing with the build-up of resentment when your partner(s) realize they'd been non-consensually kept in the dark about important information.
It can absolutely be terrifying to be vulnerable, to expose flaws, to potentially enter conflict - but when done together as a team with healthy boundaries, it builds trust. The more agreements/understandings and fewer assumptions the better.
Be mindful when unloading about a partner to other partners
Your partners are there to support you in their various capacities. However, they are not your therapist. It's also best to avoid inadvertently turning partners/metas against each other.
This doesn't mean "conceal all your feelings and hide everything from your partners." Get consent first. Ask if your partner(s) are in the right space to help you process or vent. Ask how much your partner(s) want to know -- what kinds of situations should you be more tactful regarding details?
Expect change to happen
The only constant is change. While we can do our best to cultivate stability in our lives, we cannot control everything - or even most things. We cannot control our partners. We cannot control our whole environment. We can influence. We can observe. We can reinforce and bolster our foundations.
The harder we fight against and deny change, the more we limit ourselves. This does not mean "throw caution to the wind" and never expect peace. Remaining curious and open to exploring are invaluable tools for riding the tide. Nothing remains the same.
Be like water.
